jokes ba to?!
February 20th, 2006 by dhesrapalmay nagforward sa akin nito na finorward lang din sa kanya ng pinagforwardan ng napagforwardan ng mga ito. post ko na lang dito para mabawasan ang mga forwarded emails hehehe! sabi nila "jokes are half meant". kung sino sila? hindi ko din alam, pero mukhang tama sila.
Buy a dog
If you want someone who will bring you the paper without first tearing it apart to remove the sports section
Buy a dog.
If you want someone willing to make a fool of himself simply over the joy of seeing you
Buy a dog.
If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never says its not quite as good as his mother made it
Buy a dog
If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want
Buy a dog.
If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn’t care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies
Buy a dog.
If you want someone who is content to get up on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores
Buy a dog.
If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn’t care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually
Buy a dog.
But, on the other hand, If you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness…
Then………………………………..
Buy a cat!
(You thought I was talking about a man didn’t you?)
12 Things You’ll Never Hear An Employee Tell His/Her Boss
1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 5:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is always refreshing.
2. If it’s really a "rush job," run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it’s going. That greatly aids my efficiency.
3. Always leave without telling anyone where you’re going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.
4. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books or supplies, don’t open the door for me. I might need to learn how to function as a paraplegic in future and opening doors is good training.
5. If you give me more than one job to do, don’t tell me which is the priority. Let me guess.
6. Do your best to keep me late. I like the office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do.
7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. Leaks like that could get me a promotion.
8. If you don’t like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations.
9. If you have special instructions for a job, don’t write them down. If fact, save them until the job is almost done.
10. Never introduce me to the people you’re with. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.
11. Be nice to me only when the job I’m doing for you could really change your life.
12. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it’s nice to know someone is less fortunate.
ewan ko lang ha, pero alam ko cute nman ako pagnaka-smile, may dimples pa nga ko e! c”,) bwahahaha! merong iba na ok naman (ilan ba sila? basta! hehehe!), meron pilit o kaya nman, la lang! hahaha! (pagnabasa nila ‘to ano kaya reaksyon nila?) maliban sa sahod, ano pa ba ang dahilan ko kung bakit nandito ako? wala kong malipatang iba at hmmm…. aaammm…. dududududududu…. hala! wala na ko maisip! badtrip! ang pangit ng dahilan ko! hanggang kailan kaya ko tatagal dito? sabagay mahirap din maghanap ng trabaho ngayon. isa pa humingi na ako ng sign kay Lord kung ito ba tlaga ang trabaho para sa akin, 2 beses ha at sa 2 beses na yun e nagsa2bing ito nga. hindi ako nagbi2ro, totoo yun, iba nga lang ang gusto kong sagot kaya naghahanap pa rin ako ng iba iniisip ko na baka mali lang interpretation ko ng sign. hehehe! simpleng lang naman gusto kong trabaho e, yung may malaking-malaking sahod, healthy and happy working environment (kasama na dun yung friendly people and everything… mas ok kung madaming cute na fafah! hihihi! joke!), yung medyo challenging (medyo lang ha! nakabobo kasi yung ganito baka magka-alzhiemers agad ako hehehe!), stable at may mabait na boss. (haaay!!) kailan ko kaya mahahanap yung lahat ng yan sa isang trabaho? sa ngayon, nagiintay ako baka sakali kung madami ng tao dito, sumaya-saya nman ng konti, o kaya kapag dumami ang trabaho baka magamit ko na ang mga natatago kong talent hehehe!(pagkanta!). nakakainip, ang tagal kasi e! sa ngayon kailangan ko muna magtiyaga (mga next year at 2 pa rin kami dito… baka kausapin ko na ‘tong mesa at pc sa harap ko! hehehe! baliw na din ako tulad ni…), kailangan kong magtrabaho e (para sa kapamilya! hehehe!), tutal may 2 araw nman sa isang buwan na masayang pumasok, tuwing akinse at katapusan, sweldo kasi e! hehehe!! 